Crash, Pimps, Sheepherders

Oh, the Oscars.
Had it not been for the fact that I belatedly drove to a friend's party to watch the last half, I probably would have dozed through the show. Partly because I wasn't feeling well, and partly because it was pretty lame.
Jon Stewart was passable, but if you watch The Daily Show then you've seen it all before: The rolling of the eyes, the timely raised eyebrow, etc. He must have brought his writers along so he could remain firmly in his routine.

There were, in my opinion, some pleasant surprises, not the least of which was that "Brokeback Mountain" didn't sweep everything. Hell-bent as Hollywood is to rush to embrace anything 'bold', 'maverick', 'progressive', 'enlightening', (read: anti-family, anti-Christian, anti-American), not even the Academy of the Out-Of-Touch could grit their teeth and take it like a man. So, they split - giving Ang Lee Best Director honors and "Crash" Best Picture. I saw "Crash". It was tough to watch in many places (and I'll never think of Sandra Bullock quite the same again - Miss congeniality? More like Miss Opprobrious), but in the end, a well-done movie with a bit of redemption in the end.
I haven't seen and won't see "Brokeback" - there are plenty of great love story movies out there that don't involve M4M relations. I'm no prude, but the hype surrounding this movie was nothing more than a banner for the homosexual agenda -- the one that says that if you don't want your kid's scoutmaster to be gay, then you're the one with the problem. The one that says that if you define marriage as the union between one man and one woman, then you're the pervert. No thanks.
I've got homosexual friends, and have worked and socialized with several over the years. Fine people. But none of them ever tried to 'convert' me or to bully me into some sort of approval of their lifestyle. To the best of my knowledge, none ever walked in a "pride" parade or wore their proclivities on their sleeve. They kept their private lives private, and it didn't need to be the overarching topic of conversation. They were offended by obnoxious homophobes who called them names (or worse) - but then, who isn't offended by someone belittling you and degrading you. On the subject of that sort of morality, we agreed to disagree and let it lie.
But I digress.

It was nice to see Reese Witherspoon win best Actress in a Leading Role. I guess I've just read enough interviews with her to respect the way she and her husband are staying as non-Hollywood as possible. Kudos, and if you need a role model for your "I wanna be an actress" daughter, I think I'd start with Reese.

My favorite "You have GOT to be kidding me" part of the night, however, was a two-fold event. First, the "performance" (using the term loosely) of "It's Hard Out Here For a Pimp" from "Hustle and Flow"... immediately followed by that song WINNING for best original song from a motion picture... HUH? I don't care if a rap song gets nominated or even wins (Eminem did it with "Lose Yourself" what - 2 years ago?), but "Pimp" is a horrible excuse for even a rap song. Let's look at the lyrics (with some 'editing' by me):

You know it's hard out here for a pimp (you ain't knowin)
When he tryin to get this money for the rent (you ain't knowin)
For the Cadillacs and gas money spent (you ain't knowin)
[1] Because a whole lot of b****es talkin s**t (you ain't knowin)
[2] Will have a whole lot of b****es talkin s**t (you ain't knowin)

In my eyes I done seen some crazy thangs in the streets
Gotta couple hoes workin on the changes for me
But I gotta keep my game tight like Kobe on game night
Like takin from a ho don't know no better, I know that ain't right
Done seen people killed, done seen people deal
Done seen people live in poverty with no meals
It's f***d up where I live, but that's just how it is
It might be new to you, but it's been like this for years
It's blood sweat and tears when it come down to this s**t
I'm tryin to get rich 'fore I leave up out this b***h
I'm tryin to have thangs but it's hard fo' a pimp
But I'm prayin and I'm hopin to God I don't slip, yeah

[Chorus]

Man it seems like I'm duckin dodgin bullets everyday
Niggaz hatin on me cause I got, hoes on the tray
But I gotta stay paid, gotta stay above water
Couldn't keep up with my hoes, that's when s**t got harder
North Memphis where I'm from, I'm 7th Street bound
Where niggaz all the time end up lost and never found
Man these girls think we prove thangs, leave a big head
They come hopin every night, they don't end up bein dead
Wait I got a snow bunny, and a black girl too
You pay the right price and they'll both do you
That's the way the game goes, gotta keep it strictly pimpin
Gotta have my hustle tight, makin change off these women, yeah

Seriously now... Oscar-worthy? Nice to know that in the middle of forcing women to sell their bodies, our hero prays to God that he won't slip - so he can get rich. Priceless. Oh, and I have it on good authority that a Snow Bunny is a white girl, in case you're wondering. So... did somehow only men vote for this vacuous assault on women? In order to win, I'd have to say that plenty of female Academy members had to vote for this 'song'. I will wager that the vast majority of those who voted for this 'song' never even heard it - or if they did, certainly didn't understand the lyrics. That's one advantage of rap, rock-n-roll, and other pop music styles -- people don't generally get the lyrics until after several listens, if even that. Now that the song has won, I'm sure there will be some discussion about it... but I won't hold my breath waiting for the feminists to denounce it. They're too busy railing against South Dakota's abortion ban. Hollywood, I'm putting you on notice -- the next time the cops pull the body of a prostitute or a rape victim out of a dumpster, some of the blood is on your hands. You're standing by applauding the glorification of the degradation of God's most perfect creation, all in the name of 'diversity' and 'tolerance'. You sick freaks. I'm not for censorship (people are free to vote with their pocketbook -- don't by the crap, the crap stops flowing), but HONORING such a vile slime-fest is lowly behavior even by the hedonistic bunch that makes up the majority of the film industry today. Nice try with the cute comparisons to other "strange-sounding song titles" by both Ludacris and Queen Latifah (who, before presenting the award for best song actually said "How was I NOT in that performance?" I guess she hadn't heard the lyrics either. Or were all of her in-your-face, pro-woman rap albums just a way to get paid until her acting career took off and she too could leave her principles at the door) - but I will remain offended by "Pimp" and not too upset over "Bibbity Bobbity Boo". You can bet Verna Felton (voice of the Fairy Godmother) didn't have to be on a six-second delay so the producers could catch her profanity.

I don't know if I'll be watching the self-congratulatory, smarmy, holier-than-thou Oscars next year. Things tend to get worse before they get better, and I'll bet we haven't seen the bottom yet.